People Watching

I am, like a lot of people, a prolific people watcher.  I like to take in their clothes, their hair, their hang-ups and their good points. I like to guess what they do for a living, their nationality, whether they have kids or not, are they gay, straight or something else entirely?  Let me just tell you that I don't actually care about any of this, it's not to judge but just to guess, I don't mind where you come from or what floats your boat so long as it's with consenting adults.  I do this because it passes the time of day and also because I have plenty of hang-ups of my own, it makes me feel better that I am certainly not alone in letting myself go, indeed dare I say, not as bad as others.  That sometimes I can dress quite well but more often to wish that I could dress and look better.   Shallow, yup but there you go!  One day I'll write a post about the school gate Mamas, most are fine but some like 'Miss I Always Wear My Jeans Two Sizes Too Small So You Can See My Arse Crack' are worthy of such a piece.

There is nowhere that I people watch more than the beach, where of course, my own insecurities are at their biggest.  My triple belly has not seen my bikini bottoms leave the drawer once yet this summer and on the rare occasions that I will take off my vest top on the beach I have to remain lying down, mainly so any suntan obtained won't have me looking like a striped zebra, of the red and white variety.  However, occasionally even with the shield of big sunglasses I come across someone so odd, so down right scary that I actually can't look at them, well not for very long anyway!  Well readers, he looked like some kind of sexual deviant, OK so sometimes I judge, and we guessed he was German, not sure why we thought sexual deviant and German, maybe the upcoming football match was clouding our judgement, I've never to my knowledge met any German sexual deviants.

I have been scouring the internet to see if I can find any pictures of the man in question, he is such a unique person that I felt sure that there would be a picture if not a website dedicated to him.    The guy in question was fairly old, I'm guessing late 50's or early 60's, although it's hard to tell and I am judging from his body only but he had a shaven head and was, bar his hands and feet, completely covered in tattoos. Yes, face and head completely inked.  To add to the effect was a huge bull ring through his septum and matching rings through each of his nipples, so big and heavy they seem to be dragging down his man boobs, although the sagging may have been his age, I didn't get close enough to thoroughly investigate.  I wished I had been brave like London City Mum and taken a picture, but I am a big fat coward and was probably too far away to get a good enough shot.   He was with two guys who we took to be his brothers although one was much bigger than the others, all three had lots of tattoos and shaven heads and looked like they had some underground torture cave set up in their cellar where they would eat virgins and small children, probably*.

Sadly my Googling has not unearthed the mystery tattooed man yet, but my research has led me to people of similar persuasions. So let me share with you some of the oddest I've discovered:

Wonder which football teams this guy supports?

I'm scared, please protect me:

The Man Who Had Rayburns Tattooed on His Face:  I can't bring myself to watch this, far too sqeamish!




And then this one, which I quite like actually although it's probably because he's smiling, not sure I'd like it so much if he was scowling instead.

T'husband who was with me at the time says that he'd seen him before a few months back, so that leads us to believe that he lives here and was not a random holiday maker.  If that's the case then I shall be popping down the beach more often, camera at the ready in the hope of being able to share with you.  Oh and it turns out he was English!

* Or much more likely probably not and they just have a penchant for facial tattoos.